Monday night was our 1st of 3 home study visits for the fostering program. There weren't any unexpected surprises, it was just like our International one. The only difference was the feeling and thoughts I had going through this one. The 1st home study we did for Russia I was so nervous I don't think I could think but during this one I thought a lot about how easy and how us parents that can birth children if we choose to take for granted that privilege. There are all kinds of us, married, unmarried, widowed, single, divorced that can have children if we choose to yet there's alot of families, single woman going through adoption because they can't but because they have such a deep desire to parent they jump through all the hoops, people coming into your home to see if it's "fit" for a child, digging up your past and dissecting it, checking your criminal background to even diving into the way you were parented as a child. As I sat at our kitchen table and answered question after question and explained everything she wanted explained all for her to find out if we "fit" the parenting mold they have in their minds my heart began to break for those who can't have children. Just think about it...if you have bio children. No one came into your home and looked into your past, you just decided with your partner that you wanted a child, you didn't have to pass the test so ta speck. I know many woman who would love to carry a child but can't and even though Ive said "I understand" when they speck about their loss, I don't. But Monday night it began to hit me and for all those woman and their families I'm praying. I wont say I understand again because I don't and can't but God does and I want him to break my heart for the things that break His. May God be with you all and deliver peace that surpasses all understanding.
We have been paper chasing for our foster licenses and our expired documents for Russia. I keep putting this off but its really time to start, I don't want to get the call to go and not have my homework done!
Time flies when you're having so much fun. Our countdown in days is down to...
Big wooohooo to Dawn and Rob, they received their court date and will be in Russia shortly before their daughters 1st birthday!! God is so amazing.
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