Is our home too small?

We had an interesting call Thursday late morning. Iowa Kidsnet...they had a 2 month old boy that needed a home. I never imagined we'd get this type of call when we're so close to travel dates. Part of me was saying yes and part of me was saying no. Jamie was shocked, he wasn't sure what to think. It was an emergency placement and we needed to let them know within an hour. The 1st call I made was to the babysitter, could she take another child of ours. She already is planning on Miss A so this would be 4 kids from 1 family. (I love the way that sounds) She said she really was full but would help anyway she could. I was ready to dive right into this with all my trust resting in the palm of the Lord's hand and than the questions started. I kept a strong hold on what I know and believe which is that God has a plan and His command to us to care for the orphans and widows but His is asking me to care for them all? Is He asking me to take this boy into our home and let Miss A go? I told Jamie that on most days I feel like I'm playing catch with the Lord and lately the pitches are coming fast and strong. I began wrestling over these questions with the Lord and than this hit me. I wanted to get into fostering and adoption for the kids, however if I start taking babies out of selfish reasons am I still in this for the same reason? I don't think so. It was a tough choice but I called them back and told them to find another home. I've thought about him many times over the last few days and what it would be like with him here but I'm content with our decision. I know God has me on a crazy journey and some days I think He's doing things to see if I'm strong enough to continue to follow. I'd love to have a baby in the house but I don't think God was asking us to take Him in. I don't believe that I could mother the 4 we have in our home now, a 2 month old plus Miss A soon and do them or myself any good.

Tonight I am thankful for the wonderful life the Lord is allowing me to live and to the many families that open their homes, their lives and their hearts to these innocent little children. The Lord is good!!!