Frustrated and Rejoicing

Can anyone relate to being frustrated and also rejoice about the same thing. I'm there and if I'm alone I'm OK with it. After everything that has happened I may be some what crazy!

So most of you are thinking wow frustrated and rejoicing now that's an odd combo and it is. I'm not even sure I have the right but at least it's honest. The update I got from our agency about this wonderful informative meeting that was held in Smolensk is rather bizarre and frustrating... they called to tell me that nothing was officially decided during the meeting and they would know more next week....AND? and that's all. I asked her if they thought things would move next weeks and her answer was, Jill were not assuming anything. Ok than! This makes no sense to me after the call last week about the email from the coordinator in Smolensk that said she was getting our "official" referral ready. How can things go from that to we don;t know anything? For the 1st hour (or more) I was upset and than I small part of me started to rejoice after thinking it all through. I have stated in previous post that Gavin needed to have surgery and that last Thur the judge made it a court order...surgery will be Feb 9th. Well IF we would of got the referral today, accepted, we more than likely would of traveled on Feb 4th. I don't think that would of looked good...foster mom court orders surgery for Feb 9th and leaves for Russia on the 4th. Yes I want to go NOW, but I still have to believe that God knows best and He sees the whole plan, while all I see is a trip to Russia. As much as I feel I have the right to be frustrated I've decided to trust alil more and give it back to the Lord.

Praying for understanding and wisdom!!

Love Jill