Genesis 22

Today as I was studying The Word the Holy Spirit spoke to me through Genesis 22. The story of Abraham and Issac. I realized after pondering this story, that God is calling me to lay Amara down on the alter out of obedience. I dream of her every day, wonder if she’s ok, wonder what she’ll look like in 6 months, think about all the firsts that I’ll miss, I long to hold her and call her my daughter. However, God has spoken very clearly to me that I must lay her down on the alter and trust Him to take care of her future. I have to be at a place spiritually where God is all I need and I am willing to lay down everything else on the alter as a sacrifice to Him. I have to be willing to lose her if it be His will, in order for Him to be willing to say, as He did to Abraham, "Jill, Jill! Now that I know you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your daughter, your only daughter" He will provide another sacrifice. I believe God has been in a long process of leading me to a place where I am willing to fully give up everything to Him so that He can give me the desires of my heart without me sacrificing my relationship with Him. Amara is already like a daughter to me and I love her so much I can't even explain it. However, I must be willing to give up everything, even her, and lay her down at Jesus' feet in order to experience the peace I know He will give me when I obey His call to sacrifice.

You see, it's not about me... It's not about Amara... It's not about Jamie or our family. It's about our relationship with Christ, and His relationship with us. If we put anything before Him and try to hold onto them tighter than we hold onto our Maker, we are being disobedient.

So, after prayer and time to accept the reality of this situation I’ve decided I am ready to lay her down at His feet for Him to do His will in her life. I pray with everything that is in me that she will be ours to care for on this earth very soon. But, if He chooses to take her, I have to be at a place that I will be ok because I will still have Jesus. It is then, that I really do believe, He will give us back our daughter.

Take a look at Genesis 22 one more time... and allow Him to speak to your heart about what you need to lay down on the alter today. When we let things go and we become ok with the fact that we could lose our most precious possessions because we will still have our Savior, it is then that He will bless us. And I do believe, His most amazing blessings are yet to come. I believe Amara is meant to be in our family, but I KNOW she is more importantly, His.

There will be days and moments where I know Satan will attack me and I will be fighting the battle to keep my heart and mind right here, in this scripture. Pray that I can stay here, and find the peace that passes all understanding in this promise revealed to me.

Thank you Jesus, for teaching me to give it all to you, so you can give more than I can comprehend in blessings back into my life. Amen.

Court Update

1st and foremost we want to thank everyone for their prayers and kind words over the past few days. We got word on Thursday from our agency that the court hearing was successful however Anna will still need to be put back on the Russian registry for another 6 months. In Russian adoptions anytime a bio family member comes to the orphanage, asks about a child or shows interest in a specific child the law says that the child needs to be reassigned to the registry for at least 6 months. At this time we as a family feel that God has called us to Anna and have agreed to wait out the 6 months. 6 months is nothing compared to the lifetime we hope to share with her. If all goes as planned we will be traveling to Russia April/May 2010.



In Him,

Jamie, Jill, Tristan and Austin Verduin

Update

Thanks for all the prayers. Last night was a serious time of prayer and trusting for me. I was talking to Wendy as the Smolensk clock hit 9am and I had this crazy feeling over come me, it was like I was actually appearing in court myself. I spent a lot of time in prayer alone and with friends last night and I feel a sense of peace. What I'm feeling can not come from my human power it's God, I'm feeling his closeness.

Wendy said they would more than likely hear from the coordinator soon on how court went so we are eagerly awaiting more information.

I slept the whole night and didn't wake until my alarm went off, now that's a God thing. He's blanketing my heart and for that I have to praise Him.

A huge thanks to everyone that's praying along with us and to the Whitts for the thoughtful gift and the De Jong's for taking time to pray with us and bless us with baked goods. Like I always say God knows just what we need when we need it. We feel blessed to have people like you in our lives.

I will update you all as soon as we hear more.

Please pray,
The Verduin's

Please Pray

The last few weeks have been a time of stretching, leaning and trusting on the Lord. We've had many different situations kinda thrown at us and many days we didn't humanly have the answers so we've decided to just enjoy the ride and let God lead us in every aspect of this journey. The paperwork situation with Anna (Amara) has escalated to court. The court hearing is set for this coming Tuesday. Please pray that God leads the judge in his/her decision for the best interest of Anna. We will not know the outcome of court for at least 2 weeks. Please pray!

Prayer Needed

We are a family that firmly believes God hears and answers prayers! Take a moment and say a prayer that doors are opened in our adoption and we are soon called to make our 1st visit to see Amara! We need your prayers.

A glimpse of His plan

It has been a windy road over here and some days we just do all we can to hang on as the Lord leads us down roads seldom traveled. The past week has kinda been all over the place. I called our agent on Tues and again the gal that has been working the case (this is not the gal that I've worked with the whole time through the paperwork) told me what she always says...I haven't heard anything but I will email Russia. I wasn't happy with that answer, this has been going on alittle over 2 weeks and someone somewhere has to know more. Is this actually being worked, are they doing what they need to do, how are they trying to find this man to get him to sign off? I needed answers. Later in the day on Tuesday I called the gal I've always worked with and explained my frustration, to us this is serious. She totally agreed with me and said she would take this to someone higher up so we get answers. By Wednesday morning I got a call and she had answers. She told me that the coordinator in Russia is very hopeful and thinks we need to wait this out. We were also informed that she would not have to go back on the database for another 6 months like we were previously told. This was great news. We were faced with allot of questions this week like how long will you wait for her, do you want to start another adoption while we wait, do you just want to look at other referrals, we had no idea how to answer any of these. All we knew was that God hasn't shut the door and we believe she is our daughter so how can you move on. A friend of mine said its not over til its over so we began praying that if God wanted the door shut that He would just shut it so we could move on...within two days we good this great news. God has given us a glimpse of His plan and we're holding on to that right now. We have no idea how long we'll need to wait but as a family we've agreed that we'll wait as long as needed or until God closes the door.

We covet your prayers at this time and are praying that every door that needs to be opened in Russia is opened soon so we can make our 1st visit.

Dear Amara,

There isn't a moment in the day that goes by that you aren't thought about. Mommy, daddy and your 2 brothers are running through rough waters and jumping every hurdle possible to bring you home. We almost can't stand the thought of you waking up one more day in the orphanage but we trust God is taking care of you. Keep catching our kisses in the wind and know that the 4 of us back here waiting for you will never ever give up or forget about you. We love you and so does God.

Be there soon,
Love Mom, Dad, Tristan and Austin

Fear Not

God is leaving the door! Our agency said they got word back that their contact in Russia is working on things and should know something more by the first part of next week. I'm content with this. I'm glad to know it's being worked and glad to know the door hasn't shut. This is totally in God's hands and I trust Him.

If not through the door than through a window ~ Russian Proverb

This was shared by a fellow Christian.

How often does God need to say, “fear not” or “don’t be afraid” before we actually get the idea that as His followers we do not need to be afraid of anything? Apparently at least one more time than the hundred times He already has said it in His word. I have been struck recently by the realization that so much of what happens in the world of Christians is driven by fear, in spite of this clear message from God. Given the fact that we believe, at least in our heads, that God is the sovereign King of the Universe, I am amazed at how often Christians act as if God has no clue what is going on and that doom is clearly upon us. Yet time and time again in His word God say, “Do NOT be afraid!”

Why does God tell us not to fear? There are two reasons. We need not fear anything because God is still the sovereign Lord and that means He is in control. I love how Paul says it in Romans chapter 8 after listing a series of things that people might fear he says:

“37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

We have nothing to fear because God’s love is so strong that nothing can separate us from it. The reason nothing can separate us from it is the second reason that we must not be afraid. Jesus promised that he would always be with us. We are never alone. No matter how desperate or dark the situation seems, you are never alone. When you have put your faith, your trust in Jesus Christ for your salvation, he promises to never leave or forsake you. I draw incredible strength from the fact that Jesus is always with me. To never be alone is huge! Even if disaster should strike, we need not fear because we have not been abandoned. If nothing else we know that we have a place with Him for eternity. That is what really matters.

The problem is that we are afraid for things that are temporary. We are afraid for our economic position, our reputation, our health, our happiness, our children’s comfort and safety, the list goes on. Our perspective needs to be a long view into the future. The Apostle Paul looked at all the things in this life, all he had gained and counted it as nothing more than dung compared to the surpassing riches of his relationship with Christ. If your hope is set on your health, then losing your health is a fearful thing. If your hope is set on your material things, then the lose of those is a frightening prospect. If your hope is set on your reputation in the community, or business world then having that threatened is frightening and painful. But if your hope is set on Jesus Christ and his promise to be with you always and it is set on his assurance that you need not fear, then you can be confident. You can be confident that no matter what the temporary situation is, Jesus has you covered.

So often we are afraid of the unknown. We may not know the temporary details. But we do know the permanent, eternal outcome of all things. We are victorious in Christ. On top of that we know that He knows even the temporary details. He is not caught of guard. Jesus has you covered and He is with you always. Fear Not!

The door is still open...

Just wanted to let you all know that we called our agency this afternoon and they havent heard anything. They were going to email their people in Russia and see if "they" have decided what direction this was going to go. We are still trying to figure out who they are....it's God to us so we're turning it over to Him. We will be calling our agency again tomorrow to see if they got a reply on the email and I will update you as soon as I hear.

We are so thankful the Lord lives within us otherwise this journey would be too much! God is good to us, always has been always will be even when He answers differently than we hoped.

Thanks for all the prayers we can feel them across the miles.

Isaiah 40:31
"But they that wait upon the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as EAGLES
they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk, and not faint"



Did you know that an eagle knows when a storm is approaching long before it breaks? The eagle will fly to some high spot and wait for the winds to come.
When the storm hits, it sets its wings so that the wind will pick it up and lift it above the storm. While the storm rages, below the eagle is soaring above it. The eagle does not escape the storm, it simply uses the storm to lift it higher. It rises on the winds that bring the storm.

When the storms of life come upon us ... and all of us will experience them ... we can rise above them by setting our minds and our belief toward God.

The storms do not have to overcome us, we can allow God's power to lift us above them. God enables us to ride the winds of the storm that bring sickness, tragedy, failure, and disappointment into our lives. We can soar above the storm.

Remember, it is not the burdens of life that weigh us down, it is how we handle them.


~ Author Unknown ~